Christmas with Caffrey
by I'll Fly Away
Summary: With Neal Caffrey, nothing is ever simple. Even a holiday. For Peter it's a Christmas with Caffrey and for Neal it's a Christmas without Kate. No slash.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer- I don't own White Collar.**

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"Hello?" Agent Peter Burke tried not to sound too crestfallen as he answered the phone. He looked longingly over his shoulder at the kitchen where Elizabeth was cooking what smelled like a delicious meal.

"Merry Christmas, Peter" an overly cheerful voice responded. Peter groaned. The only night he was actually home for dinner, and now Neal Caffrey was interrupting his peace.

"Who is it?" El came out of the kitchen, drying her hands on a towel.

"It's no one."

"Is that El? Tell her I said Merry Christmas" Peter could practically hear the grin in Neal's voice.

"I will, but why are you calling? Where's June?"

"She's visiting her granddaughter. And it's Christmas."

"Is that Neal?" queried El, who had been listening in the entire time.

"Yes, is dinner ready yet?" Peter asked, hoping that Neal would hear and stop bugging him.

"Not yet. Is he having Christmas with June?"

"No, she's visiting her granddaughter."

"Invite him over! He shouldn't be alone on Christmas" El smiled.

Peter suppressed another groan. He knew better than to argue with El and besides, he sort of agreed with her (even though he'd never admit it).

"El wants to know if you want to come over here" he sighed.

"Sure! I'm not imposing, am I?"

Peter was ready to make a sharp retort when El dug her elbow into his ribs.

"No, not at all."

Peter hung up and glared balefully at El.

"Merry Christmas, hon" she kissed him on the cheek.

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"This smells great" Neal enthused, looking almost too cheerful. He had shown up at the Burkes' about forty minutes after calling Peter with snow in his dark hair and apple red cheeks. The ex-con had brought a bottle of red wine and a new chew toy for Satchmo.

Peter watched as Neal took a bite of the turkey El had roasted and watched as Neal's blue eyes lit up as he chewed.

"Hon how is it?" Peter turned and obligingly took a bite.

"Wonderful" he smiled and kissed El, noticing out of the corner of his eye, the sudden sadness in Neal's eyes. However the young man was quick to hide it when El and Peter turned back to the dinner.

"How's the wine?" Neal asked brightly.

"It's delicious" El smiled.

"Good."

Nothing more was said until the end of the meal when El got up to clear the plates and Neal offered to help. El vehemently protested and shooed Neal and Peter into the living room with the remainder of the wine.

"What's your favorite Christmas movie?" Peter asked, a small grin on his face.

Neal shrugged noncommittally, trying not to remember the Christmases he had spent with Kate, watching _It's a Wonderful Life_. Kate always did love the classics.

"Oh, Neal you have to have a favorite" El insisted as she came in.

"_Rudolph_?" Neal squirmed.

Peter gave him a disbelieving look but switched on the TV, surfing through channels until he found _Rudolph_. The three of them watched twenty minutes of the movie before Peter exploded.

"Alright, this is ridiculous! Neal this cannot be your favorite Christmas movie!" he snapped, changing the channel to _It's a Wonderful Life_. Neal swallowed hard and settled himself further down into the sofa. He shifted restlessly until Peter finally asked him what the matter was.

"Neal, what's wrong?"

"Bathroom's upstairs right?" Neal flashed a quick smile.

"Yes, but-" El didn't finish her sentence as Neal practically ran up the stairs.

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**Me- So this is my first fanfic, I hope you enjoy. Please review! This is going to be a twoshot. The second part will be longer than the first part!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Continued…**

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Peter sat on the couch, trying and failing, to be oblivious to El's bewildered look. After Neal had ran up the stairs, El had turned down the volume on the TV and glared, rather accusingly at Peter. The agent had shrugged and done his best to ignore El's stare, but after less than five minutes he stood up.

"I think I should just, uh, go upstairs" he gestured awkwardly.

"I think so too" El nodded, gathering up the now-empty wineglasses.

Peter took a deep breath and knocked on the bathroom door.

"Neal?" he called. There was a sound as though someone had stood up, and Peter heard the sink being turned on.

"I-I-I'll be right out!" Neal called and Peter's heart broke as he heard his CI's voice stammer. He jiggled the doorknob, surprised to find it unlocked. Slowly he pushed the door open and stopped in shock. Neal was huddled over the sink, his blue eyes rimmed with red and glistening tears streaming down his cheeks. Peter knelt down in front of Neal.

"Neal…what's wrong?" he said softly.

Neal just shook his head and tried to stand up. Peter quickly grasped his arm and pulled him back down. He grabbed a washcloth and gently brushed the cloth against Neal's cheeks, drying as much of the tears as possible. Neal tried to say something, but it came out as a whimper. He buried his head in Peter's neck, the pain suddenly too much. His shoulders shook as a fresh round of sobbing started.

"P'ter, 'm sorry…'m sorry" Neal drew in shaky breaths, his sobs finally petering out to soundless tears. Peter awkwardly ran a hand through Neal's now mussed, wavy hair. The touch seemed to calm the con and he pressed closer to Peter, his arms unconsciously wrapping around Peter's neck. The agent gently rubbed Neal's back, moving his hand firmly up and down, feeling the muscles in the young man's back tense with each wordless sob.

"Neal" Peter cupped his hand under Neal's chin, forcing him to look into Peter's brown eyes. His blue eyes watered with fresh tears and Peter winced, knowing he had never fully realized how vulnerable Neal could be.

"What happened? What happened on Christmas?" he said softly.

Neal swallowed hard, trying to shake his head although Peter's hand kept him still.

"K-K-Kate…she loved the c-c-classics…she loved _It's a Wonderful Life_. It was her favorite movie. We used to sit in our apartment with a bottle of Bordeaux except it wasn't really Bordeaux and-" Neal didn't finish his sentence, before he pulled away from Peter and retched into the toilet.

Peter sighed, reaching over Neal's gasping body to flush the toilet. He gingerly stood up, suppressing a groan as his knees popped. He rummaged through the medicine cabinet, coming up with a small bottle of mouthwash. He poured some into a cup and coaxed Neal into standing up. Peter handed him the small cup of green mouthwash and waited as Neal swallowed and spit. The second time, Neal missed the sink and spit green liquid over the clean white of the counter.

"'m sorry" Neal mumbled, staring in confusion at the dirty counter and the small cup he still held. Peter gently loosened Neal's fingers and pried the cup away, setting it down on the edge of the sink.

"I know" Peter murmurs into Neal's brown hair. He gently guides Neal to the guestroom, which really ought to be renamed Neal's room because he'd stayed there so many times. Neal sinks onto the bed as though his legs can't hold him any longer. Peter quickly rummages through the bureau drawers and pulls out a slightly faded t-shirt and sweatpants for Neal to sleep in. Things Neal would never have worn, had he been fully awake. Peter helps Neal to change out of his clothes and put on the shirt and sweats. It's difficult, partly because Peter has never done this and partly because Neal is no help and simply lets himself go limp, slumped against Peter as the agent struggles to pull off Neal's shirt.

"Than' you" Neal slurred, his eyes already sliding shut. Peter nudges him down against the pillow and pulled the covers up, tucking them around Neal's shoulder.

"Merry Christmas" Peter says softly, turning out the lights. He stands for a moment, framed in the doorway by the light from the hallway. Neal watches the silhouette for a moment, sleep making the FBI agent look fuzzy. As he drifts to sleep, Neal thinks that Peter has finally caught him for the last time.

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**Me: Thanks so much for reading! I will be writing more in the future! Please let me know if you liked this!**


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